Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Side Order: Burger Time!!

I love burgers. I cannot get enough of them. I could eat a burger a day for the rest of my life and die happy (and young).

This weekend my beloved cookin' cousin (who happens to be vegan) decided to play Iron burger chef for me and created three delicious interpretations of the American burger all for me. All were made with a batch of 93% lean ground beef that she seasoned in secret. The first burger was topped with sauteed portabello mushrooms and vidalia onions and provolone cheese. The second was cooked with a mixture three cheeses (muenster, cheddar ad monterrey jack) inside the burger, and the third was topped with a bleu cheese sauce that my cousin made. All were delicious and a sign of true familial love.

I got home from my burger weekend and checked my email only to find a friend had emailed this link to me. The Burger Gods were sending me a message.

So for today's Side Dish we pay homage to the burger. Reflect on a delicious burger you've had. What was special about it? Was it from a fast food joint, was it homemade, was it from a Burger Specialty Store, just tell us about it. And for WFL today, please...have a burger.


13 comments:

LizTurtle said...

The best burger is always the one in your hand. A burger in hand is worth two in the bush.

I just went to 5 Guys last night with my mom - a little disappointed in the sauteed mushrooms. They were out of a can. It's probably something I could grow to like, though. All in all a tasty (and messy) meal!

My favorite burger. Hmmmm. I have a soft spot for Big Macs. My girlscout troop had taken a train trip when I was in 5th grade & we went to McDonald's & my troop leaders hot hot husband took all our orders & then brought them around to us (better than having 20 screeching girls at the counter, I suppose) & he got to my table & he was like "Ok, who got the 6 chicken McNuggets, who got the cheesburger, and who got the Big Mac." I was so embarrassed! But I didn't care. That Big Mac was so worth it. I think it's the special sauce.

Lady A said...

My favorite burger to buy is at Toledo Lounge in Adams Morgan...the Bleu Pig burger or something like that. Bleu cheese and bacon perhaps with some cracked peppercorn...I'll usually get some mushrooms and onions on it as well. But you can't beat the 2 for 1 at angles though...great burgers, wee price.

At home I usually make turkey burgers with a ton of additives: chopped raisins, black beans, minced onion and garlic, fresh cilantro, feta cheese and a splash of soy or teriyaki.

I want Five Guys again.

Earthquake said...

Jo, I loves me a good burger. I've even been known to love a well-timed mediocre burger. I have a number of divine burger stories I could tell, but I feel I should start instead with the most memorable burger story.

It was a couple of weeks after I graduated from college. I was slated to start as an AmeriCorps member with Habitat for Humanity in August, but I had a couple of months to kill before then. In order to keep both me and my parents sane, I hit the pavement looking for a job. I got turned down a lot for a lot of positions: lifeguard at a water park, lackey at a lumberyard, reception at a gas-station-storefront tattoo parlor. Considering the ink on my degree wasn't dry yet (nor on my last check to that fine institution), I grew discouraged as the days rolled by without landing a job of any sort. Surely I was worth minimum wage somewhere.

It was on a particularly downtrodden south Georgia summer afternoon that I drove sweating past a joint by the railroad tracks called "Mama's & Papa's," for the first time in the decade since I had first noted that sign, I decided to stop in for a bite.

It was what you would expect from literally a mom-and-pop restaurant in backwater Georgia: there was a handwritten sign advertising fresh (local) oyster chowder, the chairs were vinyl, and you could see in to the kitchen through a window behind the cake case. In fact, there was even the customary stares from every other person in the place that resulted directly from the fact that they didn't know who I was. The fact that I was a longhair with earrings and by myself didn't help either. So, I sat down and tried to order as quickly as I could. I asked the lady for a sweet tea and a double cheeseburger. She gave pause and said, "You sure you want a double, hon?"

Now, I had been around the block a few times, and I had known my share of double cheeseburgers. None of them had ever made me think twice about ordering them. Besides, I was already in a precarious position in the eyes of the regulars, and there was no way I could back down. I looked at her levelly and said, "Yes, ma'am. Medium rare."

Holy shit! She wasn't kidding. I have seen bigger pieces of meat before but never in person and not without someone yelling "ohyeahharderharderharderyoubastardfuckme!" When she carried my plate out from the kitchen, I honestly thought she was bound for another table. It didn't look like a burger or even a double burger. It looked like two meatloaves with a piece of lettuce in between. There was easily two pounds of meat. The top of the bun was a good seven inches from the bottom.

If I thought I couldn't back down at the order, the eyes burning into my back told me there was no way I could leave without cleaning my plate. Now, I've got a big mouth, but - DAMN! - that thing was huge. Needless to say, I pulled something in my jaw while forcing it down, and I spent the following 6-8 hours in a mixed state of euporia and agony. Perhaps most importantly, I have never, ever seen a burger like that served again anywhere ever, and, I will never, ever forget that one.

Some nights it haunts me.

Other nights it tempts me.

Heliocentric said...

Loves me the Angles Burger with Feta and bacon. I often make the mistake though of thinking it's half price, but it's actually 2 for 1, so if you can't find another taker, you're screwed. Not too screwed because you could aoways have two burgers.

I don't eat cow too often any more. Not a political or health stand, nor does it have anything to do with the taste. It's just that with pigs and chickens running around, who has time for cow.

The best burger I have heard about comes from my dad's business travels. He was in some place in Texas negotiating something about baby food and he was in the 'executive dining room' at the company's headquarters. He said he ordered what he called the best burger in the world. After dining and commeenting on it, the suit across the table took him in to the kitchen to see how they do the burgers. Suit tells cook to make a burger. Cook goes to the food storage and pulls out a juicy steak fit for a king. then he drops it into a meat grinder and then seasons it and grills it. but the point is he used like a $25 piece of meat to make one burger. When I'm invited to the 'executive dining room' I'm getting a burger... and crablegs, I just love those fuckers.

LizTurtle said...

Blimey, Blogger, WTF?

dizkonekdid said...

My fav burger is at either Dirty Martin's or at Langford's Grocery

Both of those places are good ... heck even the Christian's Tailgate isn't bad (as long as you don't mind the trailrr grrl with Meth Mouth(TM) behind the counter).

Hey .. the bet hamburger in the world is made by my brother the jarhead.

Chubby little so-and-so screwed me for genes. He ended up at 6' and 200 lbs of lean marine. I ended up with 5'7" and 205 of squishy opinionated techie blob.

dizkonekdid said...

LT blogger is still under attack today.

Lady A said...

Equake - why am I picturing you sitting next to John Candy feasting on the Ol' 96er?

Earthquake said...

Probably because that is a fantasy you have had for as long as you've known me.

It's only a shame John couldn't live that long to make all of your meat-based dreams come true...

Unknown said...

when i was in nyc over the weekend, my sis and i sat around and watched a lot of tv. we got so lazy that we ordered in from some random place. we got burgers.

man oh man...mine was SO AMAZING! it had everything: bacon, cheese, fried onion rings...maaaaayyyyyoooo.

anyway, i ended up passing out on the train from that food coma.

uni, i agree on toledo's burgers. even better on sundays when they are half off and chased with a $2 draft beer.

Lady A said...

*GASP* I didn't know toledo had half-price burgers on sundays...I'm there...this sunday...as long as the world doesn't suddenly burst into flames with little devil birds scampering all over the place!

Lady A said...

Yeah...thanks for moving Equake, my dreams of "accidently" wandering in on you and john slavering over a piece of meat in the red room have been shattered...I guess watchdog and the FNG will have to do...

Unknown said...

omg, i suddenly want a burger right now. thanks a lot jo.