Remember those wonders of packaging and marketing. Oscar mayer really put together a nice little masterpiece of fun, when in fact it is just cheese and crackers with some thich lunch meat. They have come a long way since their introduction and now have partnered up with big names like taco bell, pizza hut to make shitty versions of their already questionable food for lunch. Lunchables are high in sodium, low in nutrition and clog landfills with heaps of unnecessary over packaging.
However, they are great for days like today... at least for days like today for your MikeySunshine.
It is like today is cosmically aligned on many levels for me. I was supposed to start that shitty job that I didn't take today. I have an interview for a job I really want today. Today marks two years of bliss with Lil' Miss Sunshine. The Gators are up for the national championship in Football. Rent is due, credit card statements come out and I have to drop off my timesheet with the temp agency or they won't pay me for last week. On top of all of this, it is my day to post and I haven't prepared anything.
So where lunchables are bad for the eater, bad for the earth and really expensive for what you get. I find myself wanting the all in one easiness that they provide today because I ain't got time for much else.
What do you find yourself wanting for lunch today?
41 comments:
Pho...I really want pho.
Good luck with your interview today Sunshine!!
fcker... i posted this an hour ago just before leaving for a meeting, but blogger ate it..
dear blogger, fuck you.
love m
anyway:
goodluck mikeys, when you get to the interview spend a bit of time flexing for your new boss, they will not be able to resist hiring you.
i loved lunchables with a love that has not been rediscovered since. there was something about hermetically sealed crackers taht i loved although i never could quite deal with the mega-lunchables that came out later that were the size of a small child... remember that? four types of crackers, maybe a couple cookies, two types of meat and (get this) TWO flavors of cheese, yellow and white (note: they had the same flavor)...
back in the eightie-nineties we didn't have environmental problems yet so lunchables were okay.. Jersey still had entire counties that had not been converted to landfills and our ozone was as tough as the east german women's speed skating team… as were our colons.. Come on, no one needed colonoscopies back then… mmm.. I wonder if I can get those (lunchables, not colonoscopies) still at my local ShopRite…
So in celebration of fryday's blog I bought a deep fryer this weekend at kohls and spent the remainder of my Sunday watching football and deep frying at a rate slightly greater than my rate of consumption… before I eventually passed out (likely due to trans-fat overdose) I had fried, tacitos, italian breaded raviolis and turkey mcNuggets (my personal favorite). Tonight shall be assorted tempuras (yay!) and possibly deep fried lunchables..
Speaking of Pho, I am still in Pho-enix. Lunch will be pizza and lots of water.
I love lunchables but haven't had them in about half a decade.
Big game tonight (mikey I am making the gator chop thingy with my arms).
back home on wednesday.
Speaking of environmental problems, I am scared shitless for my family, friends and everyone else on the lower half of Manhattan island today. So far they are saying not to worry but I am hoping, praying and doing everything else I can (there ain't much else) that all will turn out to be well.
Hey NYC, the OWFL is thinking about you.
Jo, what are you talking about? Is the fear level upped in NYC?
Damn you, M, I really want fresh-out-the-fryer food now. Argh. But it's restaurant week, so I won't be having that for dinner (unless the steakhouse I'm going to has deep-fried steak . . . mmmmmmm).
I used to love lunchables. Then I made the mistake of reading the nutrition, sorry, "nutrition" label. I don't care so much about sodium (I have good cholesterol & blood pressure), but damn, the calories & fat! So I have not had a chance to partake of the pizza slut/taco hell lunchables. Man, those sound good, too, though.
Lunch today = leftovers from mommy & daddy's house last night. Soup = chicken + spinach + egg drop. Stir fry = pork loin + veggies + rice. Lunch = yum. I just wish I had some redcock sauce to put on it. I like that heat. Ah well.
Ok, I just went to CNN. I see why Jo is scared. The Post has nothing on this. Conspiracy? I'm just saying . . . .
I'm not ready for today either Mikey. Grandpa died (the last one) on Friday and it has been a rough weekend. I knew the proverbial crap was going to hit the fan at work today ... and it has. As for the weekend? It sucked. The only thing good was visiting the Doghouse Pub with RoEsq and her friend Shelley who waitresses there.
All that, coupled with the shame of putting up a video that totally destroyed the anonymity rule ... well. What a crap week.
Oh today will likely be just some food. I don't know ... what should I have today. I have an hour and a car. Anyone know anything about Houston?
Sorry about your grandpa, Diz.
All I know about Houston is that when I transfer there, my other plane is always at the other end of the concourse.
Diz, so sorry to hear about your grandpa.
In addition to NYC, there is also some sort of issue with a bunch of dead birds in downtown Austin. I think I see the four horsemen now . .
On a lighter note, I just witnessed the most insane example of poor metrobus driving EVER! Because people kept running willy-nilly across the street between my building and the Metro, Montgomery Co. built a little stone wall on the median, forcing people to cross at the crosswalk. Well, as I was walking back from picking up lunch, a metrobus was turning from
Rockville Pike onto the street w/ the wall in the middle. Well, he took his turn too wide, and had to stop (blocking both eastbound lanes) lest he hit the wall. I'm thinking: "Great, now I have to wait to cross the Pike while this asshat backs up," when, undeterred by the STONE WALL in front of him, the bus driver guns it, drives up onto the median, knocks over No U Turn sign on the median, and HITS THE WALL. Of course, I still then had to wait while the asshat then backed off the median and completed his turn. I don't think anyone was hurt, so it was really funny.
Thanks all, everyone is at the funera in TN. I couldn't make it because I have a trip to Singapore this next week. That said, we sent them lunch from Panera.
RoEsq just got an "A" in family law!!! Everyone cheer for my little soon-to-be-divorce-lawyer!
Got Gators, and congratulations to Van Halen on their Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction. I couldn't come up with a VH song about lunch, so I'm going to go with a hamburger, which I will force to dance before eating.
congratulations roEsq.
i got sweettie (that's how they spelled it) rolls at the sushi place today.
amazing.
it was tuna, wasabi caviar and avacado wrapped in salmon and red snapper with that spicey orance sauce on the side...
mmm
wasabi caviar.
Dipso. + 25 points for the Go gators. +23 points for knowing about Van Halen getting in. - 7 points for not at least coming up with VH's 'Everybody wants some'. The scene in Better off Dead in the burger joint should qualify it in some way as being about lunch.
M. Mad props for the short trip down memory lane and for giving us the Jersey perspective of the 80/90's. +14 points.
Peep. Thanks for the good wishes and fot the congratulations. Any girl who can put up with me for two years gets +975 points. You get +18
Diz, sorry to hear about your loss. Take as many points as you neeed.
Thanks to all who well wished me on the interview. It wasn't an interview proper, it was more of a first interview, but I feel really good about how it went.
Lunch was a Ham & provolone on a Kaiser & Chicken n rice soup. Filtered water with a bananna for desert.
Quite appropriatly, NPR is talking about yesterday's vision of the food of the future.
I imagine that nobody from the 20's would have thought up the lunchable, but if you had shown it to them, they would immediatly be able to identify it as coming from the future.
I for one am glad that we did not go with the meal in a pill vision of future food. I am however disapointed that we aren't eating more astronaut ice cream and similarly prepared meals.
And while i'm giving out points,
roEsq Congrats on such a great grade. -43 points for making another lawyer in the world.
Miso. +19 for chosing the "mike" +2 bonus points for Franks. That shit is like liquified gold that makes anything better.
Jo + 42.0 for the Gator Chomp. It's a dumb looking cheer, but it's ours. (the FSU tommahawk is way cooler looking. Too bad that whole school and athletic program are offensive to my entire being)
Turtle, - 17 for reading the "nutrition" on lunchables. +19 for Red Cock
GG, +35 for Asshat. Never heard or seen that before and it gave me a good laugh both times. No points awarded for the second mention of the term.
Lady A +28 points for being first comment and for well wishing.
To the best of my recollection, three Van Halen tunes could be about lunch:
Ice Cream Man, which would go nicely with Poundcake for a delicious, if not nutritious lunch. And of course, Everybody Wants Some, because isn’t that just the truth about lunch?
Sorry about your grandpa, Diz.
Jo – according to NY1, the Mayor said that they don’t know what it is – but it’s not dangerous. I’ll keep thinking good thoughts for the NYers near and dear to all of us, b/c that’s not so reassuring.
Myself, I am just off a plane from Orlando, to which I can say, “I’m so glad I’m back. Why oh why do people live there? What a fucking hole.” For lunch this weekend I had a polish sausage from outside of a Lowe’s and some fish tacos from some bar on the beach in Cocoa Beach (where everyone is tan and leathery and chain smokes). Overall, it was “eh.” However, it was great to see TheBestFriend, ride in an airboat through the swamp, play with baby gators and learn about Seminole chickee (pronounced CHEE-kee) making.
Today I had half of a turkey club and water from some airport kiosk in Charlotte. Why half, you ask? Because it sucked. AND it was $10.50.
I’m so glad to be home.
Oh, and congrats Mikey! I can't bring myself to give you a "Go Gators" because, well, Florida is a terrible state and it's hard for me to support anything from there.
Sunshine--It's one of my favorite words, but I didn't coin it. I can't remember where I picked it up, though, so feel free to spread it around and claim it as your own! Also useful are 2 variations. (1) Asshatiness: the quality of being an Asshat. (2) Asshatery: behavior typical of an Asshat.
Also, does anyone want to have a Restaurant Week dinner w/ me, LizTurtle, and BonBon on Thursday night at PS 7's at 8:45. We have an extra reservation, and I know there are lots of folks here who love good (bargain priced!) food and aren't afraid of staying up late on a school night.
Sunshine, my "forcing the burger to dance" comment was an allusion to the Better Off Dead scence. I think you need to dock yourself some points for not recognizing this and scolding me for no reason.
HT, the alternative to supporting Florida is supporting Ohio. I think this is a no brainer.
VIP luncheon leftovers in the big kitchen. Some kind of salad with chicken, goat cheese and candied walnuts for a Monday lunch bonus!
When I was dating the lady in charge of music classes at an elementary school in Georgia, I was big fan of the days when my lunch hour was capture by Van Halen's "Hot for Teacher."
[a moment of silence for conjugal lunches]
Went to Gordon Biersch on the company dime today to welcome a couple of new people in to my department. My out-on-maternity-leave boss even dropped in for a surprise visit. Kind of makes me sad that the waitress hadn't brought our shots of Old Grand-Dad yet.
I had the guacamole and bacon burger with the omnipresent garlic fries. Opened with the crab and artichoke dip and the bruschetta. On the verge of a catastrophic evacuation in mere minutes.
diz: no words, man, but no fun. I got nothing for you in Houston, either. The best I've done recently is drive through on my way from Austin to Atlanta and make a quick detour to drop off my buddy ToBeOrNotToBe's wife out at IAH.
mikeysunshine: keep texting me. It's like a little surprise dance party. Do I get any points today now that I've shown up?
I haven't had a Lunchable since this past September when I picked one up at Kroger on my way to playing hooky at Six Flags on the first day of public school here in DC. Totally in your face, schoolkids!
I like mixing up the proportions in my cracker-snackers. Sometimes I'll just do a double turkey so I can have a double cheese later on. I love processed cheese. I love it.
Ha ha - I love the word asshat. Such imagery. Man, how do you spell 'imagery'. That just looks wrong.
Sunshine - I am sorry, I meant to say 'Good luck on your interview & I hope you updated your resume this morning to include 'Led team to alley-high score of 535 Saturday night.'
Phew - positive point total.
Sunshine--Congrats on the high score! But y'all went bowling without me?!? Now I'm just gonna assume the best and pretend that no one checked the blog for my late response on Friday, but will someone please let me know (perhaps via a private e-mail) if I need to schedule some time to go cry in the ladies' room this afternoon? Thanks.
i learned the term "asshat" from miso. i used it with reckless abandon and then someone told me that i had learned it on the O.C.
but i didn't. so i never uttered that curse again.
i now like binding standard four letter curses with religious deities
buddha-cock!
shiva-fuck!
etc etc
Earthquake, since you got me the contact number of one of my professional references, Ima give you +32 points now that you're in scoring position.
HT + 8 points for recognizing that Orlando is a hole
and Ima give myself +143 points. No, not because that was my score in the 3rd match during cosmic bowl, but because I earned myself a second interview as soon as tomorrow.
Dipso, I totally missed your dancing burger reference, so I will deduct 10 points from my score and give them to you with a one point service fee. so adjust your score card +9
I don't know if anybody's keeping score, but y'all are doing great today. Seriously. It's nice to have a handful of comments when you post something. them holiday weeks were hard on the ol' pride.
Sunshine, can I score more points for recognizing other locations in Florida as holes? I will take the point lead if that is the case.
Tot,
I'll refer you to the argument the other day as to what am and what ain't in the South (as far as FL is concerned. OK is NOT in the South as established. LT might still be a northern carpetbagger, that has not yet been determined)
You can try for bonus points naming holes in Florida, but if your hole falls in a respectible part of the Sunshine State, you stand to lose points.
So ask yourself, am I a gambling Tot? Or am I a scardy Hater?
Oh, I'll bet with a fair amount of certainty that you too will consider such villages as Christmas, FL (though, props to Captains Frank and Joe for their airboat piloting and swamp tales) and Bithlo, FL (again, shout out to Speedworld, home of Crash-a-Rama featuring such events as the 100 lap Enduro Race, School Bus Figure 8, V/8 Demo Derby, Compact Demo Derby, Boat Trailer Race, Auto-Roller Derby, Blind Fold Race, Skid Car Race, Flag Pole Race) and Cocoa Beach (home of Cheaters Gentleman's Club).
There is no way any of those places don't rate as Holes in the Mikey Sunshine: List of Florida Places, Rated Guide.
OK, without your exceptions, I think you stood to lose points on Christmas and Bithlo. I mean have you ever seen a school bus figure 8 race? That's what America is all about, or should be anywise. That's probably why democracy ain't getting a foothold in Eye-Rack. They ain't got 'nuff demolition derbys to quench they thirst for destruction, and they therefore rely on car bombs to fill that hole.
Cocoa Beach is a hole even with Ron Jon's and Cheaters.
HT, give yourself +12 points with a bonus point for each of the 9 events you mentioned from speed world. and + 1 point for giving us the link.
So add + 22 points to your tally.
Wow, a 143 in the third game, huh?
If you had knocked down one more pin, you would have tied my low score for the night.
[kisses biceps: first left, then right]
Yo, I could not miss to comment on a day that Mr. Sunshine does posting.
Tampa is no hole. We are having pirate festival, municipal skate park, easy to find weed, palm trees, sexy girls, pawn shops on every corner, and the sunshine skyway.
Lunchables are offensive to freedom. it like food they give you in Russia. You have to use right ratio for each kraker. drop a hamm and you don't get the full measure of meal. Plus ILL Mitch can not stand Cherry flavoured drink, but also can't stand Skittles. Which again insults freedom since the snicker comes with cherry drink capri sun, and the skittles come with fruit punch capri sun. I hate them for trying to fence me in, Yo.
Miso, thanks killer
M, that sounds freakin killer.
I had Jason's deli .. anemic sandwich, but I had semi-fresh fruit and a [Bernie Mac]cookie![Bernie Mac]
And Mikey, with a personality like yours .. you don't need luck .. just turn it down a bit and you'll wow them.
Sunshine, I have never lived further north than Vienna. And I went to college in Carolina (oh yeah, I dropped the 'North'). So, I belive I have more southern cred than you do. (She types, laughing, as most people recognize that Northern VA is a weird in-between sort of place. And her college is sometimes known as the University of New Jersey in Durham.)
Oh, and I was born in Eye-ran, fucker, so watch yourself before I nuke your ass back to Stone Age. Allahu akbar!
LT, was I just out in the sun too long and drunk, or did I see that VIRGINIA TECH beat yinz guys on Saturday?!
LT, the deal with that is that North Carolina share the "Hillbilly Mountains" with Tennessee. That was at one-time the moonshine producing capital.
So because of its close-association with people that resemble the Dukes of Hazard, North Carolina gets a "Southern" buy.
Thing is, the South may have lost, but they are still more popular ... its like the North is the dorky kid that grew up to be rich ... but still occupies the same social class he\she had when they go back to their reunion.
Any place that would produce a team like the Boiler Makers.
I only know Boiler Makers as a drink I'm afraid of.
had lunch at 4:15...soup and pretzels...almost as bad as my oatmeal lunch on friday. double boo. DOUBLE YAY for sunshine's second interview!
I loved lunchables.
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