Tuesday, September 19, 2006

HAPPY TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY!!! ARGGGGGGG!!

Sorry bout the late post guys, had to fight with some bitches this morning about a clothing donation I was trying to make...I lost.

So, its Talk Like a Pirate Day...I have a post-it eyepatch on in celebration and my index finger (when not typing) is hooked. So, what are we eating on this holiest of holidays?? What would a pirate eat?? I have an apple in honor of the late Captain Barbosa, but the rest is up in the air. I wish there was a turkey leg stand somewhere around here...

WFL MATIES?!?!?!

88 comments:

Josephus said...

miso am I right in assuming you saw the "Piratitude" edition of "Wife Swap" last night?

Please say yes...please say yes...

HaterTot said...

Rum. That is what a pirate would have for lunch.

I on the other hand will be having Diet Coke and Jell-o. I'm a shitty pirate.

LizTurtle said...

Hee! I totally forgot about this special holiday! Arrr, matey, I've got (2!) ham and cheese with maiche, tomato, lettuce, dijon, and me father's special salad dressing on what turned out to be sourdough rolls. Ye gads, sourdough. Ah well. Me made me bed, so me lie in it.

And for later - banana, honey, yoghurt. Arrrrr, 'tis no good for the scurvy, but good for the tastebuds.

And very punny, peep. Pirates don't like puns. I'll cut of ye head next time I see ye! Arrrrr!

Jada said...

Pirates hate to crash their ship, but what do they love to crash?

PARRRRRrrrrties!

m said...

yaaaaaaarrrrrrrrggggg... captn Jo: last night i be watching said "wench swap"... YARG, it was glorious!
I vow to embrace pirattitude in all coming lunches!

LizTurtle said...

Oooooooh, or mead. I would love some mead. Instead I have to make do with the unfermented stuff (honey, right?).

m said...

. . . it be driving me nuts . . .

joke to follow . . .

shiver me timbers

Jada said...

How much does it cost a pirate to pierce his ears?

A buck-an-ear!

Jada said...

What do you call a pirate who poses for Plaboy?

A Play-matey!

Jada said...

A sailor meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns telling about their adventures on the seas. The sailor notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook and an eye patch.

The sailor asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?"

The pirate replies: "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off."

"Wow!" said the sailor. "What about the hook?"

"Well," replied the pirate, "we were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand off."

"Incredible!" said the sailor. "And how did you get the eye patch?"

"A seagull-dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate.

"You lost your eye to a seagull-dropping?" the sailor asked incredulously.

"Well," said the pirate,"it was my first day with the hook..."

Josephus said...

Thanks m, I now feel a little less dirty.

ARRRRGGGGHHH!

Very hungry. I think I may get salad again.
Maybe this will be a salad week?

The Doctor said...

I came in to find this message in my inbox:

“This is a friendly reminder that the August / September Birthday Lunch is today at noon in the large kitchen!

Enjoy!”

That banks the full $7.25 today!

Uhh, it’s like finding treasure?
Ar?

Josephus said...

Dippy I thought you had taken charge of the office birthday lunches?

Earthquake said...

Limes. I'm having limes for lunch. I'll ward off the scurvy that lt shows no respect for, and to her detriment, ye can be sure.

At least, that's what I would have if I were a pirate. I, however, am going to have Thai, I think. I could get behind some Thai.

Oh, that's bullshit. I'm going to end up at McDonald's today. I'm off Thursday and Friday so this week is stupidish. Cramming five slow days in to three reasonable days is stupid. Ish.

If only there were someone to flying suplex all of the stupid work-people (and drivers) for me...

Josephus said...

Sorry, Arrgh Dipso, me seems to remember that ye were taking control o' the work birthday pirate ship! Did yer rebellion gets repelled?

Earthquake said...

Yo ho! The sailor's life for me.

Actually, I'll settle for making an eye-patch for my one-eyed python.

LizTurtle said...

What be ye callin' a lad with no arms & no legs hangin' on the wall?

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrt.

Lady A said...

Question...
What is it that everybody has
And some pirates and theives try to take...

DA BOOTY (and if you is a crook than you takin' it)
DA BOOTY (and if you got money you shakin' it)
DA BOOTY (come on everybody that's here, that's word
to Phife Dawg and my man Shaheed)

I will sing that all day long in tribute to Pirate Day.

Josephus said...

Arrrgh! Which of you DC landlubbing barnacle buzzards will be sailing to A Tribe Called Quest this here Friday?

LizTurtle said...

'tis no man. 'tis a remoreseless eatin' machine!

LizTurtle said...

Arrrrrr, matey-Jo. If ye be pickin' up the tickets for Tribe, then I be in.

Heliocentric said...

Earthquake, I am more of a double wishbone suplex kind of guy, but I may try this flying suplex on this stupid work people for you.

I no celebrate Pirate day. Old tag team parther, El Macho, decided to become pirate and go solo. See you in hell Barba Negra.

FOr lunch today, Ultimo Dragon will have Plantains Fritas, and arroz con frijoles.

Lady A said...

I wish there was a Long John Silver's around here.

I'd be all over some crab coins!

Heliocentric said...

Earthquake, You see that the National building in Thailand has been surrounded by tanks while the leader guy is in NY at the UN? I say go withthe Thai. Mcdonalds will be there tomorrow, Thailand may not.

Heliocentric said...

Lady A. All summer I had access to the unholy union of Long John Silver's & Taco Bell. I could get a crunch wrap supreme, a double layer taco, and hush puppies, Add 3 shrimp for $0.99

'Twas divine.

Heliocentric said...

Ah, the Long Juan Bell. This is a restruant of legend in my town.

Unknown said...

"Professor, what's another word for pirate treasure?"

"Well I think it's booty...booty...booty, that's what it is"

ironically, i'm probably having beans and rice today.

Heliocentric said...

Get in to the spirit of the day with the Pirate Name Generator

Earthquake said...

dragon: I will settle for any suplices you may have lying around.

lady a: crab coins. Nice pull!

sunshine: I am confident that the culinary repercussions will not be felt before the end of the week.

jo: no good on tribe. I'm in St. Louis for a wedding this weekend. I will be having liquid lunches from Thursday through Sunday.

Those stupid work people won't stop asking me why I'm wearing this parrot today...

Heliocentric said...

I screwed that up. Try this link to the
Pirate Name Generator

m said...

My pirate name is:
Bloody Sam Cash
And i be eating a chicken parm and canoli...
erm...
rum glazed fowl on tack bread and a side of squid..
YARRGGGG

Heliocentric said...

Iron John Roberts is me moniker.

I mean monikerrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

LizTurtle said...

Arrr, me name be 'Dirty Bess Kidd' & apparently I not be showerin', tho I answered 'aye' to that question. Arrrr.

Me sourdough sandwich turned out to be quite fine - made the cheese on there taste closer to goat. Arr goat!

m said...

Every pirate lives for something different. For some, it's the open sea. For others (the masochists), it's the food. For you, it's definitely the fighting. You're musical, and you've got a certain style if not flair. You'll do just fine.
Flair?? WTF ...

LizTurtle said...

'Iron John Roberts'? For real? Avast! That sounds like a football play-arrrrrr, not a pirate, ye wimp!

Earthquake said...

Captain Sam Flint

Even though there's no legal rank on a pirate ship, everyone recognizes you're the one in charge. Like the rock flint, you're hard and sharp. But, also like flint, you're easily chipped, and sparky. Arr!

Sparky, indeed.

Lady A said...

Calico Charity Vane...WTF??

Earthquake said...

Iron John Roberts?

I'm pretty sure that's what our Supreme Justice went by in his brief and minimally publicized porn career.

Earthquake said...

(By the way, he carries a hook of his own, if you catch the cut of me jib...)

Lady A said...

By my pirate name, I'm assuming my ship has quilted sails and I give my booty away to the needy.

Jada said...

Dirty Mary Rackham

You're the pirate everyone else wants to throw in the ocean -- not to get rid of you, you understand; just to get rid of the smell. You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!

Ummmmmm, no comment.

Anonymous said...

What be a pirate's favorite animal?

An aaaaaarrrgggDvark.

Me be eatin' a salad today.

Me thinks Tribe sounds groovy, where does one pillage tickets?

Anonymous said...

I be Dread Pirate Kidd.

Like the famous Dread Pirate Roberts, you have a keen head for how to make a profit. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!

Heliocentric said...

OOO calico charity. Despite what you may think, el Ultimo Dragon is quite lonely. 'tis been a hard road to 7th place in the community center wrestling league standings, and it has been a lonely one.

Dragon could use some quilts as weather gets colder and charity booty.

Lady A said...

Well Ultimo...I could crochet you an afghan and give you HT's booty...will that suffice?

LizTurtle said...

Calico Charity Vane. Ye probably be the one swabbing the poop-decks and makin' the gruel for the rest of us. Jada, I had the same line about being thrown in the ocean b/c of the stink. Hey, I think maybe that site recycles. Recyclin' 'tis not the pirate way! Arrr!

m said...

i bin noticin' some of ye scaliwags may not have a grasp on the vernacular of a pirate...
(leering at you UD)... i unearthed this short course to viddy...
http://loadingreadyrun.com/showmovie.php?x=480&y=360&url=talklikepirate.mov

HaterTot said...

Bloody Ethel Bonney

Every pirate lives for something different. For some, it's the open sea. For others (the masochists), it's the food. For you, it's definitely the fighting. You can be a little bit unpredictable, but a pirate's life is far from full of certainties, so that fits in pretty well. Arr!


mmmmmm... jell-o....

Heliocentric said...

at this time in the Dragon booty drought, booty is booty. and at this time of autumn in the mountains, blanket is blanket.

Thanks lady, you ok.

Community center looking for ring girls, how you look in bikini, holding round card?

Heliocentric said...

Dragon have enough problem with english, can't conquer dialect just yet.

Lady A said...

RING GIRL??!! Shit..when I enter the ring I lay the GK smackdown!

Heliocentric said...

Ah, the feared Gut Kick.

That now illegal in most federation... unless you what they call 'rule breaker' Thats a wrestling bad guy.

Heliocentric said...

Lady A, weren't you selcted to be a wrestler a few years ago? That's the GK isn't it? the Gonnerehan Korean

Heliocentric said...

Oh, that GK. You are a legend, m' lady. Wait til El Gordo hears about this. I found the GK on superhighway of informacion.

Heliocentric said...

Rumored new roommate has not shown up at the Newton House yet.

That's right Watchdog... you've finally been replaced. Or so the rumor goes.

One of the Pinger's tree hugging, hippie caveman buddys is supposed to mov in to the Uni/Quake suite.
But he ain't nowhere to be seen.

Carve yourself a sundial hippie.

OOps, I mean:

Carrrrrrrve yeself a sundial, land lubber.

LizTurtle said...

Shouldn't it be "tree-lubbing hippie"?

Earthquake said...

Aye.

Capt'n Sam Flint once loved huggin' the trees.

Now, I makes them into planks fer walkin'.

By hippies.

Josephus said...

Ahoy mateys! I deepsixed the salad idea to Davey Jones' locker and ate me self a burger topped with cheeses of cheddar and provolone and some bar-bbeeee-que sauce. From a pub calle ye old bottom line.

ARRRRGGGH!

Lady A said...

Ahoy Hot Servant Boy! I'm lookin' at yer crotch wit me one good eye!

Anonymous said...

aaargh!! replaced am I?! I knew ye would try such scaliwaggery, hence he mysterious absence. Me had he walk the plank and hence dragged he across the barnacles.

Heliocentric said...

Ahhh, ye keel hauled the new swabbie.

Ghaaa. NOw we be needin' to plunder another fool.

Lady A said...

Does the FNG play cards sunshine?
That should be a pre-req, we need a 4th!

m said...

buxom wench kkd: i be loving the ween reference...

Earthquake said...

Bah! Lady A, I still play the cards, and I live not seven seas away.

All ye never needed to do was ask.

Heliocentric said...

ALERT, YE SALTY DOGS:

Forget ye not that the new Presidentress of this here schooner be celebratin' her assent to power with a grogfest on the morrow of morrows.

Aye, 'tis true. If ye be wantin' to show yer loyalty to the new Cap'n, git yer maps out and mark an X over Bravo Bravo on Thursday. Then prepare for a parade as we go to pillage at the Buffalo Billiards.

If ye be wantin' to show loyalty, or ye be stayin' loyal to the old cap'ns yer mutany will go in the ships log and ye'll be watched closely.

If'n ye make berth in another port, ye can still celebrate with mead or grog at 6 and 45 by the clock on the east coast. Just raise yer flaggon and toast the new skipper.

HaterTot said...

In the spirit of the day, I pillaged for lunch. I found some Chinese food in the conference room and helped myself. (er, after someone told me it was there, and that I could - I'd make a shitty pirate)

Heliocentric said...

I was just thinking about playing some cards today. Don't know if FNG plays or not... I guess it's a 50/50 chance sine folks either play or they do not.

Josephus said...

Arrgh! Me forgets to menchin thatme's fantasy foosball team slapped the slobber from the beards of mikeysunshine's last evenin'.

Arrgh!

Heliocentric said...

HT, I;m sure you'd be a great pirate. You just need to find your inner swashbuckle and You'll figure out what your piracy thing is. Maybe you aren't on the boarding party, but you stay on the ship and burn the CDs for the voyage from Napster. Maybe you do all of the piercings for the crew. Maybe, as lady A offered, you give up the booty to those who need it.

I think you would be a good pirate and you could sail with me anyday. (as long as you're bringing the tunes and giving up the booty)

dizkonekdid said...

arrrrr!!!!

13 Coin today from The Black Walnut Cafe.

Heliocentric said...

Aye... Aye

'Tis true. The Dragons of Josephus came from the inky black with tenticles and teeth like a shark wrestling with a giant squid, and it had as foul a stench as ye would find anywheres. The brave men on board me ship fought proudly and by sundown on Sunday had beaten the dragon back to the sea, but somehow the monster regained his strength, and by Moons day had devoured me crew.

I blame that jerk Mark Brunel. Fucker.

Josephus said...

"Those funny little birds! They have no wings!
Oh what shall we do! With the funny little things!
Oh what shall we do, with the funny little things...."

Not a pirate song, but kind of sounds like one...and technically it could still be a pirate song.

(jo prize to the first correct id of the song).

Heliocentric said...

Any Ladies looking for a room to live in in the DC area?

Lady Sunshine is looking for a roommate, move in next week.

Earthquake said...

Speakin' of kings of the high seas who slapped the briny ass of their fantasy football opponents...

I'll be painfully absent from the happy gathering in observance of our new cap'n's ascension from the cargo hold.

In that storied port of St. Louis for that, too.

Me hearties...

Heliocentric said...

JO, that Sounds like the Goblins from the old Hobbit record / book we had when we were kids.

Josephus said...

Way to go mikey. Your jo-prize is being packaged and sent as I write.


I've mentioned the graphic novel The Watchmen on the blog several times in the past, it so happens that it contains a downright evil and depressing Pirate story which you can find partially recreated here called Tales From the Black Freighter.

If that piques your interest you can borrow my copy of The Watchmen from HT (she's had it only for about 7 years now) or borrow Jada's copy, or bite the bullet and buy one on amazon.

Tell them the czar sent ya.

Arrrgh!

Heliocentric said...

the Pinger just gave me the Graphic version of the 911 comission report. It's like a comic book with the findings of the commission. THe commission signed off on it as official so it is interesting. I though Jo would like it. Not words like in the report, but pictures like in the funny pages.

Heliocentric said...

Ultimo Dragon enjoy the graphic and comic books. easier than reading.

Heliocentric said...

Cien, Cien, Cien! Yo Soy 100

Heliocentric said...

My work here is done today. see you at the gym.

Heliocentric said...

Adios UD

Seriously, there's no chicks out there looking for a place to live?

Josephus said...

Yo mikey, re: the comission's comic report...BRING IT ON!

Heliocentric said...

She's already on Craigs list, but wants somebody a little less random than that.

Heliocentric said...

but thank you miso, I appreciate it.

HaterTot said...

I'm so close to finishing it, Jo. I really am. Pages away. It's sad when I can't even maintain my focus on a picture book...

Jada said...

I had a dog with everything and some fries. The place near my office even uses the electric green relish of which HT is so fond.

Brian said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Brian said...

"Pirate Jerk" by Creepy D

Ahoy!

I take my pills
Drive like a trucker
Can I call you collect
Mother fucker
I don't need a car
Don't need to work
I'm the creepy sailor
I'm a pirate jerk

Sail on
On and on and on
Sail on
On and on and on and on
On and on and onnnnnnnnnnn

Ahoy!
Ahoy!

I've got more problems
Than a stripper
I'm not the captain
(he's the skipper)
I don't need a job
I don't need to work
I'm the creepy sailor
I'm a pirate jerk

(chorus)