When I set out to watch 12+ hours of television, it’s highly likely that a few of those hours will be spent watching cooking shows, and I have anecdotal evidence that suggests I’m not the only OWFLer who wiles away the hours learning to make 30-minute meals.
A brief rundown of some of HT’s favorites:
Julia - I like that she was always dropping shit on the floor and throwing it in anyway. She was a disaster in the kitchen from a cleanliness standpoint, but there was no one better from whom to learn the basics. Her The Way To Cook is the best kitchen reference I know.
The Frugal Gourmet (Jeff Smith) - Poor, dead, child molesting Jeff. I actually think maybe he just sexually harassed some adult men, but I'm not entirely sure. For all of his faults, this man is the sole cause for my love of TV cooking shows. The Frugal Gourmet was one of the only shows my parents and I could stand to be in the same room, at the same time, to watch. The Frugal Gourmet Cooks American is still one of my favorite cookbooks, and I miss Jeff's wacky sense of humor, and even his occasional interjection of Jesus talk into the kitchen (he was a minister, as I recall)
Nigella - I love this woman, and want to be her. I love that at the end of her show, it often shows her coming down to her kitchen in her bathrobe and eating out of her fridge. Watching Nigella is one of my favorite things in the world to do. She's hot, she has an accent, and her food is just ridiculous. Plus, she makes pretty kitchen things. What's not to love?
Giada - Oh, lovely Giada and your Everyday Italian. No other show makes me drool like this one. It's just so porny. Nigella may have led the food porn revolution with her
soft lighting, flowing hair and round, firm, uh, tomatoes, but Giada has perfected it. I could watch nothing but this show, everyday, all day and be completely mesmerized. And fat. Really, really fat.
And lastly, one of the most devisive figures on the cooking show scene. The mere mention of her name elicits groans or squeals of glee, depending on if you love her or want to drown her in a boiling vat of EVOO.
That's right, Rachel Ray. Myself, I like her food, hate that she's a big liar with her 30-minute bullshit, and generally want to stuff and truss her and roast her like a Thanksgiving turkey, but I rarely turn her off if I happen upon her, because the woman can make stuff that's probably already in your pantry (and DEFINITELY already i n Uni's pantry) into some delicious goodness.
So, who are your favorite tv cooks? Which are your favorite cooking shows? What do you look for in quality food television? And when are we going to see Lady Amalfia and her damn meatloaf on the Food Network?????
Special shout out to LizTurtle - Happy 18th Birthday!!!! Congrats!
Oh, and lastly - WHAT'S FOR LUNCH????
(I'm aware that the spacing on this is weird and fucked up, but I don't know how to fix it. Anyone who's able is welcome to go in and change it)
52 comments:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIZ TURTLE!!!!!
I was a big fan of Jeff Smith back in the day ("it was actually a wednesday" I really can't get into Dane Cook). I don't believe any of those charges against them. If they were working on his show for the free food...well...
B. Smith was a family friend so I always tried to watch her shows when I happened upon them. I remember eating scrapple with a breakfast she cooked once when I was a kid. I wonder if any of you even know who she is?
These days I am a serious Iron Chef America fan. And I have to admit that Iron Chef Flay is my favorite.
I can't turn away from Alton Brown's silly shows. The missus and I turn to eachother and chuckle when he does one of his funny bits. Sigh...we're terrific. I haven't seen his new road trip/motorcycle show yet.
If it's near dinnertime our tv magically stops at Rachel Ray for 30 minutes of "EVOOing" and catching a glimpse of her tomato (I learned to call an ass a tomato by reading Bloom County).
I like Giada, but everytime we watch her I get the feeling that she might be evil. I'm not sure what it is. Very cute, great cook and great filming style, but somehow malevolent.
Not sure about lunch today. I'm thinking turkey and swiss.
God bless Bobby Flay! There is nothing better than watching that man transform an ungodly large hunk of meat into a tender pile of awesome.
Of course, I only seem to end up watching cooking shows when I'm hungover. Which, actually, is more often than perhaps I should admit. Like today.
For lunch today? I don't know yet, but it's going to be comforting because I needs me some comforting today.
Fortunately, I am comforted by the fact that it is lt's bday.
I think I've only seen Nigella's show once or twice. But each time I creamed my corn.
Oooooh...where oh where do I begin!!!!
Well first of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY LT!!!
I think I started to get all squealy and teeny boppy like when I saw HT's post this morning. Not to mention that I got a full 9 hours of much needed sleep last night so I feel actually "normal".
As you all know I could (and have) squat on the couch and watch every single thing on the food network and be completely satisfied. I do favor some more than others. I am a big fan of Giada, Rachel Ray, Michael Chiarello, Paula Dean and ANY special FN challenges (cake ones are the best). Ina Garten is ok (barefoot contessa), she has great recipes but I find her a bit annoying and snooty. I HATE Bobby Flay ever since I saw him throw a temper tantrum on the original Iron Chef (which is so much better than american iron chef). I'll watch his show because he does magical things with grilled meats, but overall I think he is a prick. I've only started to watch Emeril within the past year and I find him more entertaining than I did years ago. If you haven't watched "Ham on the Street" u should, it is funny, me likey. I've only seen a couple minutes of the new "Ace of Cakes" but I intend to add onto my agenda for the week. And if you see me with a blow torch, Kweef's tool box and my Kitchen-Aid...you'll know I was inspired!
Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee is kind of cheesy but entertaining and offers some good tips for short-cut ideas. And she likes her cocktails! I swear she is drunk on half of her shows. I don't think The Naked Chef (Jamie Oliver) is on anymore but I think he used to make all kinds of funny noises while he cooked. And whatever happened to Yan Can Cook?!I LOVED that show.
Julia is an icon.
The last time I saw Martin Yan, he was waving from a float in San Francisco's Chinese New Year parade in early '01.
I too love that Almost Homemade lady. Though, she reminds me of the drunk neighbor lady who's hair is too bleached and who wears just a smidge too much makeup and at whose house the mailman stays just a few minutes too long. But, she always brought the best jello molds to the neighborhood block party.
Happy Bday LT.
I actually never watch cooking shows, at least on purpose. I once lingered on Nigella's show, that's cuz she's hot. I've never heard of this Giada lady, but I agree that she's hot. I've heard of Rachel Ray, and she looks kinda slutty in her picture, so based on how hot I think they are, here are my top five cooking show hosts/hotties:
1. Nigella Bites (this!)
2. Giada
3. Rachel Ray
4. Julia Child (experience counts!)
5. The chick from species
"Can I cook or can't I?"
-Dr. Carol Marcus
I hate blogger. That is all.
Happy B-day LT,
I for one and more into the HGTV network. However, I have been known to sit forever in front of Iron Chef competitions.
I love Chef Nobu!
Regardless, I am into them not talking and just showing us what they got. I would mind an "Chef Idol". I would be all over that. I'd run up a million bucks in text messaging.
Unfortunately, I'd prolly be the only idiot like that.
Still really jealous about not getting to go. So I'm not talking to anybody the rest of the day :)
Everytime I go to visit my mom, we watch the Food Network all day, snack, and then bust out the wine or gimlets around 3. Ah, family bonding . . .
So I love everyone on the Food Network--except I'm gonna have to disagree with folks on Sandra Lee. The woman is deranged, and everything she makes looks like it tastes like crap. There's a fun internet rumour going around that she used to be a man, though. My top 5:
5. Frugal Gourmet (even if he is a perv).
4. Alton Brown
3. Giada
2. Nigella
1. Paula Deen (love, love, love her--I want her to adopt me and make me cheesy grits every day!)
Jada, Martha is much more than just a cooking show and she deserves her own special post. She can not be lumped into this one trick ponies who may cook up a storm, but wouldn't know how to compost, trim back a rosebush or craft Christmas ornaments from pipe cleaners and twine if their lives depended on it.
Help Request!
I'm trying to find the title and locate a short story. It may have been written by F. Scott Fitzgerald, but I'm not positive. It was about a woman and I believe an old friend she hadn't seen in a long time. They were hanging out at her house and got drunk in the afternoon and they were smoking cigarettes that she kept in a box in the living room. I believe she had a child, I think a dughter, and she was being watched ny the nanny while they were getting liquored up. Is this ringing a bell for anyone? I need to find it ASAP.
so many non-lunch related points of interest:
happy birthday lt, have a separate lunch for every year.
congrats again miso on the job and new place. i'll bring my own air mattress if i come up. and for lunch you eat your former boss's heart (then you gain his powers or something)
Cooking shows: i was strictly an original iron chef man just because it seemed like possibly the least applicable to my life and thus the least pressuring.. i mean if you don't have lobster brains on hand, you can't be expected to make that very delicate entre... all those american ones make me feel like i shoudl do soemthing more than heat up left over chinese or have my favorite dinner, bourbon and crackers. mmmmm
but lately i've got into good eats mainly to sate my rather nerdy side (it's a large side).
Lunch today i refuse to admit but i'll give you the important stats:
250 calories, 13g of fat, 310mg of sodium, 30g of carbs adn 4gs of protein...
sounds damn healthy to me.
also... the band Cursive is touring now (east coast coming up at the end of the month) and their newest album is really quite unbelievable. "Happy Hollow"... it is providing quite a bit more sustance for lunch than this other tripe..
LT, Happy Birthday! You don't look a day over 17!
Can I add a vote for my favorite fictional cooking show--"The Delicious Dish" from SNL. Just the memory of the Alec Baldwin/Schwetty Balls sketch makes me giggle.
Oh, and lunch today is a spinach salad.
Martha Stewart is a convicted criminal!
Today is the Taqueria I believe.
dislike rachael ray as she is a side talker (only talks out of one side of her mouth) and annoying.
dislike bobby flay b/c he's an arrogant prick.
dislike giada because no one should be an italian chef and be that skinny.
LOVE paula dean b/c she makes the best (but not best for you) food ever
LOVE alton brown b/c he's a nerd and taught me how to make the best scrambled eggs ever
LOVE yan can cook b/c he made asian cuisine, and i just gotta support my peeps.
today is left over breadline food that i bought yesterday. dunno if it'll satisfy me, but i will work out today and that is that. i will also upload photos since i'm FINALLY GETTING MY COMPUTER BACK!!!! HURRAY!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAPPY HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY LT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jada, in answer to your help request. I have no fucking idea.
Also, I have no fucking idea why one would ever need such information "ASAP". Very curious indeed...
Good luck finding it!
Jada: rings a bell. Of course, a Fitzgerald story where people sit around drinking and smoking doesn't narrow the field much. You've got me looking now, though.
Yeah, the ASAP was probably kinda weird, but I got an inspiration and if I don't act on it, it'll be lost.
Thanks for your help guys.
what makes the best scrambled eggs ever? the only trick i've heard is use room temperature eggs and a bit of room temperature water.
now you've got me thinking about dinner
I just read a much better short story.
Someone's lunch stinks.
Put sour cream in the scrambled eggs. cook on low.
Jada: I'm coming up short on the specifics, and I'm afraid I can't afford reading another story until I get home (and get my hands on the book and do this proper), but I thought this one was phenomenal: http://www.sc.edu/fitzgerald/pirate/pirate.html. (What has two thumbs and is no good at embedding hyperlinks? THIS guy!) There's plenty of smoking and lounging but no mention of a kid...
HT- did they use real mexicans?
Mexicans, Salvadorans... same thing, right?
Hey all! Thanks for the birthday wishes! I can't believe my underage secret is out. I guess it doesn't matter anymore now that I'm the age of majority. Tee hee!
Have been swamped & probably will be for the rest of the afternoon, but how could I not post today. Julia Child is the best. She's the original. There is no other. Fun Fact: She worked for the OSS, the precursor to the CIA, back in the 40s. How about that! They interviewed her for the CIA cookbook: "Spies, Black Ties, and Mango Pies". Everyone should buy that book.
I think the only time (yes, I'm admitting it) I watched Giada's show was when I was hungover at HT's in the morning. It all looked fabulous, but she's right, it's so porny. There are all kinds of smooshy & sucky sound effects. It almost made me vomit. But that was the hangover.
Iron Chef (original) rocks. I love the Chairman. Especially when he's all contemplating an onion or a pepper & then chows into it like it's an apple. Ha ha!
WFL today: I went crazy for my b-day & went to Boston Market for 1/2 dark & creamed spinach & yams. I was disappointed in the yams. Which was the only thing different about that meal than what I usually get (side salad). I don't know, I guess I built it up in my mind too much. I had the same reaction the one time I got their mac & cheese.
So tired. Couldn't sleep last night - too much stuff going around in my head.
Molly - we had a whole Schwetty Balls kinda thing involving my muff over the weekend - sorry you weren't there to partake!
Soylent Hispanic.
So this is one of my ideas for a cooking show...it focuses on just one recipe or menu per show. And the point of the show is to go over a variety of ways to adapt that recipe to fit your lifestyle. Make into vegetarian, turn it into a low cal/fat meal, how to incorporate more seasonal ingredients, how to adapt it for diabetics or other medical conditions, short-cut ideas or even how to jazz something up for fancier shin-digs Has this already been done...does it sound boring??
I’m a nerd...UNINERD
Sounds great boss!
So, like how to use Oil of Kraut when there are no Polacks available?
Sounds awesome to me, Uni!
I think that's a great idea, Uni. Fabulous! You can create a cooking empire! And then you'll rule the world!!!!
Uni--I would watch that show.
Back to the Schwetty Balls--the reason I love it so is that my family make their own Balls at Christmas--Peanutbutter, not Schwetty. Nothing is more amusing/ potentially scarring than making yuletide peanutbutter balls with your grandmother and hearing her say: "Mimi (her mom) liked big balls, but I prefer them smaller--you can just pop them in your mouth!"
I'm imagining similar (though probably more intentional) Muff discussions this weekend.
NUT BUTTER!!!!!!!
those pancakes were damn good.
After the fact, I realized that I twice asked my boss today:
"Do you want me to stick it in your box?"
The answer: Yes.
Actually, its a him, and I did
I don't watch too many cooking shows (too busy with the televangelism and primate stuff) but I do occasionally catch "License To Grill" on the Discovery Home Channel.
The host, Rob, looks like the love child of Jermaine Dye and Kirby Puckett. All dishes are created in his backyard on a couple of monster grills. They usually have some sort of wacky theme and the show ends with his lily-white friends eating in slow motion. I was initially attracted to the program by the odd title sequence with ends with a very Infarto-esque announcer groaning "IT'S TIME TO GRILL!!!".
I also enjoyed Justin Wilson back in the day. I guar-onnn-teee it.
(Lunch today was a breaded steak sammich from Ricobene's)
Oh and "Take Home Chef" on that same Discovery Home Channel isn't bad either. Australian guy goes to a supermarket, grabs someone who is shopping and offers to go to their house and help them cook a meal for their significant other. The whole "surprise!" thing when the spouse comes home to a TV crew is a bit annoying, but the recipes are usually pretty creative.
Happy Birthday Liz.
THREE POST FREAKOUT!!!!
two hot tamales, HT: susan fenniger and mary sue miliken. i loved those bitches. i ate at their restaurant in santa monica once and had this AMAZING dessert that was a sort of torte that was surrounded by giant cream puffs. it was so fantasmaorgazmical.
HT, qweef, and i had uni's famous meatloaf last night for dinner...and MAN OH MAN was it ever so tasty. uni also let me shop in her pantry for some goodies...yay full pantries!
I would start crying if someone came up to me in the grocery store & offered to cook for me & my significant other. "My cat eats only canned food. WAAAAAHHHH!!!"
Innnnn-fffaaaaarrrrrttt-ooooo. Oh, that's the best.
Does no one remember Paul Prudhomme?
Justin Wilson was great.
I'd forgotten all about him.
Justin Wilson was a favorite of my dad's. Is that dude dead?
And, yes, I remember Paul Prudhomme. I remember specifically a confusing moment from my childhood when I couldn't understand why the guy from Cannonball Run was cooking on TV. I did not realize that Paul and Dom DeLouise were not the same man.
Dom D.... now that's someone who's just not around enough anymore. I saw him on an I Love the 70's thing, and remembered how great he was. Boy, how I loved those outtakes at the end of the Cannonball Run movies...
Holy shit... go to www.justinwilson.com and have your volume on.
I GARONTEE!!!!
I'll have to check out justinwilson when i'm home.
Yeah, I used to get them mixed up too. 'Where'd that accent come from?'
OH MY GOD. I'd neglected to pull the last few days off my Onion desk calendar & I was just bringing it up to date & I got to Sept. 1 & it has a picture of Steve Irwin & says "Crocodile Hunter The Same Way In Bed".
AAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Happy B-Day, LT!
I've been out of the office at a seminar all day. Will catch up on these comments tomorrow...maybe.
Had a spinach salad w/ warm bacon dressing, bacon, mushrooms, egg, tomato and these huge shrimp. It was excellent. Shula's steakhouse on the company dime tonight! Surf & Turf, baby!
Hope everyone lunched well today.
I had my favorite Tuscan chicken salad with balsalmic vinaigrette from Nookies Too for lunch. I also got my boss's bowl of chicken noodle soup, but I was too stuffed from the salad to eat, so I'll probably have it for dinner. They also have the best candies in a bowl at that place. I took two sizeable handfuls when they weren't looking. Ace loves them too, and we fight over who gets the plum ones.
thanks for all the b-day wishes guys! you guys are the best! *sniff sniff*
Post a Comment