Wednesday, July 12, 2006
In the year 2000...the sandwich will be a relic of times long passed...replaced forever by the whichsand, which features a slice of aged (and extraordinarily expensive) wonder bread placed between two hunks of reprocessed partially hydrogenated meat-product…in the year 2000....
In the year 2000....people will no longer go to "restaurants" for "lunch" rather they will watch holographic shows of Nigella jr. bites while soylent green is pumped into their veins intravenously....in the year 2000...
….in the year 2000…the OWFL blog will become the most popular non-porn website on the internet…making it number 350,825 overall….in the year 2000….
Okay, 2000 came and went (Y2K suckas!), but you get the idea. What is your vision of the future of lunch? What do you picture yourself eating in 10 years, 20 years, 50 years? What will our great-grandchildren be eating after the world’s ecosystem collapses and most of the food chain is wiped out? And of course, what will YOU be having for lunch…in the day 12 July?
(I’m posting early as I kinda blew my last scheduled post)
45 comments:
I love it watchdog, hilarious...especially because I'm picturing Awreck singing "In the year Twoooo-thOUsaaaand" with a flashlight under his chin. I can't wait for the future...errr..tomorrow.
Hm. In the day 7/12, my lunch may actually wind up being a late breakfast . . . weird! Actually I just got into work after being up cleaning until 1:30am. I am so out of it. I may have to dig into my last can of Tab Energy. After I go get a bagel.
Miu, you should go get a free Slurpee for lunch. Oh wait, that was yesterday. Well, you can still try - just fill it up & walk out the door. Just think how refreshing that'll be! Mmmm . . . icy. Nah, seriously. Try to find gazpacho.
I'm supposed to be having a late lunch with TheBestFriend. Which means I'm just leaving work early, most likely. Which is all well and good, but I'm kind of hungry now.
WD, this is also going into the All Star posts. Good work!! Conan is so dreamy...
Hot day, cold food, so gazpacho would work.
I need 'brainy' food today, cuz I just got a big assignment at work that will require lots o' concentration. What kind of food of the future helps your brain work gooder?
I think we'll be eating more insects and lots of freeze-dried ice cream.
I have no idea what I'm doing today. I was thinking salad, but maybe I'll go to Jack's deli and get a turkey sandwich.
Here's a message from Earthquake delivered from the Austrian-Hungarian Border:
"Tell the OWFL I had a wurst platter for lunch. These motherfuckers around here loves themselves some sausage. I don't know about the scenery, but I'm hoping heaven's menu is like this."
Well, I haven't gone for my bagel & now it's a little late. I guess I'll just let my tummy grumble until closer to noon. I'm really craving a personal pizza from Listrani's. Damn, which I totally don't need. And I'm pretty sure gazpacho is not in the cards (i.e. the restaurants around here) for me. Argh.
WD: Brain food = carrots = gazpacho. ;-) Or fish! Find the oiliest, smelliest fish you can & eat it. This will have a 2-pronged effect: 1. fish = brian food & 2. you will stink & no one will want to visit with you so you'll be able to work work work.
WD = go and get a jamba juice smoothie with "brain" boost...it's the stuff with ginko biloba in it. i used to work at jamba juice way back in the day when i was a wee la choi-lette. back then, they used to be called "inertias" instead of "boosts". smart ass customers would come in and say "inertia? why do you call it this? it makes no sense!" buddy, i just work at jamba juice...i ain't no nutritionist foo'!
i envision us not eating food but popping pills that taste like food. kinda like the jetsons or willy wonka when violet chews on that magical food gum.
today will be me finally eating a lunch i brought in on monday. currently i'm eating a morning glory bran muffin purchased from b-line downstairs. i suspect lunch for me won't be until 130pm or so.
OF COURSE HT thinks conan is dreamy. he used to come by the restaurant next to my old apt in boston...he's tall!
So humid out, I just got back from a 12 block round trip walk and was drenched.
I will not step foot outside again unless forced. So lunch will be from Mom's lunch counter in my building. Maybe the chicken salad.
In the year 2000 I think humans will learn to love liverwurst and I will not be mocked and stared at for ordering a braunschweiger hoagie with salami. In the future people will be more tolerant.
Hey chi-towninans - everyone ok over there??? Saw the news this morning about the train derailment. Hope everyone is safe!
Local news, shmocal news. I just found out from LT (a commonwealther) that apparently we DC folk are under a 'Crime Emergency'...with 14 homicides since July 1, I suppose that qualifies.
To quote Lawrence from "Office Space"...."Fuckin' A"
the way i see it, we cannot control when we leave this earth. therefore, reading up on the latest chicago subway tragedy is fine but not if you think it'll prevent some sort of subway related accident in the future. unless they provide sage advice like "when it is over 101 degrees out, do not ride the el b/c it is bound to jump off the tracks and kill you."
not hungry yet. just realized that i'm having that chicken vindaloo thing from TJ's but i am also meeting with my girls for HH at heritage (indian food) where there will surely be more indian fare. i hope i don't explode.
I think the "crime emergency" was declared because someone was killed in Georgetown. And now the politicos have to act like they're doing something...
I used to ride the Blue Line in Chicago. In fact I once vomited between cars after leaving home early due to a not so pleasant hangover.
Sigh...
Apparently one of the police officials said that Georgetown residents need to be on the look out for black people. Silly him, I'm always looking out for me.
so are you "in" or "out".
PROJECT RUNWAY SEASON PREMIERE TONIGHT!!!!!!! so watching it...
If our softball game hadn't been rained out, there's a good chance that I would have been rushing to catch that very train. It left clark and lake at 5:09...so I probably would have missed it unless everything went just right...or wrong!
Anyway, I think I'll splurge on lunch to celebrate my new lease on life. Burrito de barbacoa...con guacamole!!!
That sounds yummy dipso, should have got that. Instead hit the buffet next door for a hodge podge of food products.
And man oh man is it HOT out there. Jo wasn't kidding...
Wow, Dipso, glad you missed it. Yikes!
DC is going to hell in a handbasket. It's pretty bad when you get mugged on the freaking mall (aka "America's Front Lawn"). Although, what were people doing on the mall at that time of night? Eh, I guess I walked to from the Smithsonian metro station to get to Friday night jazz before.
Lunch wound up being a gyro, which totally hit the spot! Yum!! Although, given the weather, I should have asked for extra yoghurt sauce. Yummmmm. Other than that: parfait.
I am going to make the effort to actually watch Project Runway this season.
I'm not sure everyone on OWFL has been watching this. If you aren't, please change your ways and start tonight. Go back and forth between it and Project Runway (you poor fools without DVR).
Oh and lachoi, your last comment was a little insane.
By lachoi I mean wookie of course.
And her comment BEFORE her last one.
Was there a train accident in Chicago?
LT, I knew there was a reason you weren't in my world series of trivia texting circle...
LT and uh, our other friend, who reads but doesn't blog, goes to Trivia at some bar in Laurel. They've never invited me. Okay, well that's kind of a lie, but I like to say it.
It's a lie, unlike the statement, "I've asked Jo to teach me euchre and he's ignored me." As that, my friends, is 100% true.
Oh, TheBestFriend is en route from Silver Spring to pick me up for lunch. Any suggestions for where we should go?
HT, why not take her to the Mayflower for a liquid lunch?
HT doesn't want to learn euchre!!!
LT, LT, LT...why invite someone to a circle jerk if they aren't enthused to spew?
Jadey, Jadey, Jadey...
I'm confident that by the year 2000, science will have perfected the Willie Wonka meal-in-a-gumball thingy, doing away w/ all unpleasamt blueberry-related side effects. That's all I plan to eat
Today was a group lunch a Copeland's to celebrate finishing a license review. I had a not-remotely-Cajun shrimp and pasta thingy with a side of awkward smalltalk with some engineers!
THe 600 year old man is just ahead of his time. He's wearing the toilet of the future.
Miu, did he have a top on?
(please say no, please say no...)
holy crap miu. where do you work again?
work boots? flip flops?
600 Year old men have incredible senses of style. I love the plaid bermuda shorts with ratty knit sweater, fish hat, and penny loafer ensemble. When you're that age, you can totally pull it off!
I love the nose and ear hair mullets that 600 yr old men have.
I wish I had that kind of bravery in my personal style.
I loved how my Grandpa would suddenly pause in mid-step, rip an incredibly loud fart, and then keep on truckin'. He would do that anywhere, the grocery store, church, you name it. Old people are awesome
My grandmother's husband wore slippers and a little boy's clip on tie to my brother's wedding...it was 8 inches long and stopped at the top of his HUGE italian man's gut.
Miu, it sounds like you live in some David Lynch version of Lake Woebegone.
Remember that commercial for the Style section of the Post years ago? It showed a woman & man walking into her apartment & as soon as the door shuts, she sort of attacks him & sort of grabs his tie to pull him closer to her & it snaps off in her hand & he looks horrified. Ha ha ha! Clip on ties are the best!
We have all missed the essential question about the 600 yr old man...what do we think he had for lunch?
I think he probably eats mashed peas - looks like shit. Smells like shit. And yet, it ain't shit. Huh! Anyways, definitely something he can gum his way through. This guy can't have teeth, can he?
Miu, I have not heard the story of the singing lady. So please tell, even if others have heard it before!
My uncle used to always recommend that I wear clip-on ties as opposed to the traditional kind. He would say "that way, when some chump grabs you by the tie, it will pull off and throw him off balance, that's when you pop him in the jaw."
Maybe I should mention that my uncle was a solid drunken irishman with ties to the mafia, and tended to get in fights all the time, apparently while wearing ties.
WD, wouldn't it be more like "that wey, when some chump grabs ye by the tie, it'll pull off and trow him off balance, that's when ye pop him in the jaw, the limey bastard!! Who stole me lucky charms??"
LT: Exactly!
laughing at this whole line of commentary...i love yous bastards.
why was my comment so crazy, jo? is it because it's so true that it rocks you to the core?
ick, just burped chicken vindaloo...leaving in a few to HH with the GFs from grad school. whoot ooot! ladies night!
Wow, Miu, I was totally expecting something more along the lines of "well, there's this girl. and she sings. to the mailbox. She ain't right."
Any thoughts on who her baby-daddy is?? Is your town small enough that you might know him???
Oh, and I totally read 'rap-lover' as 'lap-rover' & thought "well, yeah, if she doesn't know who her baby-daddy is..."
I've just returned from "lunch." Yes, it's 6:15. But, you see, TheBestFriend was here. And we went to Lauriol Plaza for tex-mex and swirly margaritas and gossip and wedding talk. I had fish tacos, which were so-so, but the tastiness of the margaritas more than made up for it.
I'm going home now. I should go to the gym, but... well... I'm in no shape for that. Tomorrow, I tell ye' - tomorrow!
And GODDAMNIT I WANT TO LEARN EUCHRE. AND NOW, I WANT TO LEARN AND WIN!!
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