Thursday, March 30, 2006

Jury Duty and my new hero, Juror #3



I reported for Jury Duty earlier this week and successfully avoided a trial. Was my first Jury Duty appearance, and I loved it. I was able to read for 2 days. I was selected for one panel and it was the most fun I have ever had. Why? Because of one man, Juror #3, who was called onto the jury panel, and gave the greatest show I have ever witnessed. The story goes as follows:

18 jurors sitting in the box, answering the judges questions, and then being questioned by the attorneys. Oh I should state that the case was against a man convicted of selling crack cocaine out of his Harlem apartment to an undercover cop. Anyhow, juror #3 explains earlier when asked about previous court experiences that he had just been through a terrible custody battle but said that he thought he could be fair and impartial. This was on Monday, right before we were excused for the night. When we came back on Day 2, the judge finished and it was time for the attorney's to ask. We start with the smug prosecutor, a female, very professional, blonde hair, blue eyes, athletic build, and she had the look on her face that she thought she was so prim, proper and doing the right thing for the state of NY and that everyone loved her. So she starts with juror #3 and brings up the custody battle and asks him if it is going to affect his ability to pass judgement on this case. We're all in the audience thinking we're about to get a routine answer when he grabs the microphone and says to her, "I was actually up all night thinking about this, and you remind me of my ex-wife's attorney, and I HATE YOU." We all stood there with mouths open, not believing what we just heard. I was shocked and actually laughed. Then everyone started to laugh, even the judge. The Juror #3, looks at Mrs. Prosecutor, and says again, I HATE YOU. I hate all lawyers like you." It was awesome. I never admired someone so much. I wanted to jump over the rail and give him a high five. Needless to say he was excused from the case.

Anyhow, that's my jury duty hall of fame story. Does anyone else have great stories from Jury Duty? Lunch during Jury Duty is great too. Because of slow days on the court, we were given an hour and 45 minutes each day. I took my sweetass time and walked over to Tribeca and had some long lunches of reading and drinking coffee, and one day a panini with prosciutto & mozzarella, and a bowl of tomato soup and the next day a croque monsieur. I miss jury duty. Can't wait to be called back in 2 years.

Oh and WFL? It's 60+ degrees in NYC today! Is Spring finally here?

14 comments:

Unknown said...

wow, that is probably the best lunch/jury story ever.

mine is not as cool. i had to sit through a day of stuff in boston when i was a student there. it was annoying...there was no drama or anything to laugh at for that matter.

however, there was the BEST burrito place near the courthouse. they served up a mean burrito al pastor with roasted green chiles. delish.

today, salad again. i may supplement the meal with a soup at abp. tomorrow is the big eat/drink off so i got to stay good for less than 24 hours. i may work out during the day too.

Josephus said...

I have to go in for jury selection on Monday. I hope I get a juror #3 on my panel. This is my second time going in. The last time, about 2 years ago, I ended up sitting in the selection room all day and then finally being called into a courtroom at 3:00. I told them right away that I had scheduled work travel two days later and would not be able to sit on a jury. They kept me there until 5:00 anyway. I For some reason the two books I had with me were "The Prophet" by Kahlil Gibran and "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho. I read about 60 pages of each and then borrowed a woman's Star Magazine.

I'm back at work today, yet I feel sicker than at any point over the past two days (allergies) and DC has all of a sudden decided to hit 70 degrees.

"When you want something, all the world conspires in helping you to achieve it." What a crock of shit.

I want salad today. And I think it'd be great to chase it with a chili-cheese halfsmoke.

dizkonekdid said...

Heed e-que's warning. While James Vernor had what could be described as, "the best damn jury-duty story ... ever", I'm pretty sure you've never wanted to sit through 2 nerdy companies bitching about who stole the ideas for Fluid Dynamic Bearing motors first from General Electric and some Stanford student.

Lady A said...

Heeelarious! I'm so glad that I switched days with you JV...cause that story is pretty priceless!!

I hope you got his # or e-mail address...I'm curious to know how is custody battle works out...!!

I don't know what to have for lunch...my stomach has been icky.

LizTurtle said...

My entire jury duty experience consists of phoning a special hotline every day before work to see if I had to go in. Monday, the message was "If you are groups 5, 6, 12, 25, 26, or 27, report for jury duty. Otherwise, you are not needed today." Tuesday through Friday the message was "No one is needed today." Dangit! I was so excited to get out of work. Siiiiigh.

My grandmother got called for jury duty . . . about 5 months after she died. And the form had several little boxes for reasons why you couldn't do it & there was one that said 'dead' or something to that effect. I guess they don't update their rolls very often!

Lunch today was my chicken & quinoa from yesterday. Mmm. I freaking love quinoa now. I could eat a whole bucket of it.

LizTurtle said...

That cheesecake link didn't work, miu. And I'm super-curious now . . . .

Lady A said...

savory cheesecake...I'm totally making one for HH one of these days....

I love quinoa also! I use chicken broth instead of water when I make it for some extra flava flav!

LizTurtle said...

Ooooh, I'll try that - thanks Uni! I am new to the quinoa, & when I was making it the other night I was debating fancying it up or just enjoying it plain, seeing as how it's new to me. I went with plain & a small blob of butta.

Anonymous said...

I've been called to jury duty twice in DC. Never have I made it out of the "holding pen" area, never even saw the inside of a courtroom.

I sat next to a nice looking old lady. She smiled at me and went back to sitting quietly with her hands folded in her lap, starting at the wall. About 20 minutes into our wait, she asked me: "how long are they going to keep us here? I'm 72 years old!" I told her I didn't know, but that it could be all day. About 20 minutes later she asked me: "how long are they going to keep us here? I'm 72 years old." I told her I didn't know, but that it could be all day. About 20 minutes later she asked me AGAIN, and AGAIN 20 minutes after that. Finally I got up "to go to the bathroom" and sat on the other side of the room. She kept up her questioning, pestering the person next to her. They kept us there til' about 3:30pm, and she was 72 years old...

The funniest part of the day was at the end you could go collect your $5 payment for showing up for jury duty, and they asked everybody if they would like to donate it to the court. You kept me in the holding pen all day with crazy granny and you want me to give the money back, riiiigggghht....

LizTurtle said...

Miu, if you like brushing with chicken stock instead of water, you'll love this.

LizTurtle said...

Dammit! I mean, this!

LizTurtle said...

I like how they have Crest Whitestrips under 'related products'. Yep, you're going to need it after scrubbing yellow powder into your teeth . . . .

Josephus said...

Great post today JV. I have to admit that depite my allergies (I'm feeling a bit better and less bitter now) I am very very excited about the next few weeks. Tomorrow night is giggles' b-day celebration, Sunday night the baseball season officially begins, jury duty Monday, birthday Tuesday, conference starts thursday night (when rico gets into town, plus it looks like jade will be coming and JV and the bride seem like a go as well), TV seems to be really good these days, (amazing episode of Lost last night, Thief on FX is great, West Wing is finishing strong) it's a legit 70 degrees outside, the missus is on spring break soon, and...well, that's plenty.

I'm knocking on wood now so as not to jinx everything.

LizTurtle said...

Don't bruise yourself.